Hey, I Know That Guy.

by Paul on September 25, 2008

You probably know him too, or have crossed his path.

He (or she) is the boss who ignores the pathetic mismanagement in one part of the company, because that part is headed by a pal of his, and besides, he’s never really understood what it is they do, exactly. He’s the guy who has ignored anyone who dared to warn him that he might want to pay attention, maybe even yelled at them for being disloyal. He’s the guy who at company meetings has repeatedly talked about how well that division is doing, while increasing numbers of the workers in the rest of the company look at each other doubtfully, because they’ve heard the stories around the water-cooler, and know he’s either BSing them, or is utterly clueless.

Then, one day, this guy realizes there is a problem. His buddy has screwed up in too colossal a way, and it can’t be hidden. That part of the company is in meltdown. Mr. Big’s butt might be on the line. And that’s when this guy is at his most annoying.

After having ignored or impeded all previous attempts to correct the problems, he suddenly swoops in and tries to throw his weight around. Because he’s new to the problem, he much more panicked about it than appropriate, which hardly seems possible, given how bad it is and how hard he was denying it a few days earlier. But for the people on the ground, who’ve been working day and night to hold things together and solve the problem Mr. Big has been denying, it’s just an insult. They are the ones who have been losing sleep, after all. Not him.

He’s the guy who, while uselessly and annoyingly getting “hands on”, is overheard on the phone canceling a scheduled activity, blaming it on the crisis he’s “needed” for at the office. This comment, once it spreads through the office, becomes a sick joke for the tired and stressed people doing the actual work. “Ha! Needed! Right. Like a hole in my head!” they think momentarily, then return to trying to unravel the mess that Mr. Big has been ignoring, the one created by his buddy.

We’ve all seen this pattern. Maybe not in a big company, maybe in a small business. Maybe in some local volunteer organization. Sometimes the thing that needs to be fixed is big, sometimes small, but it’s all the same. The guy who created the problem, either directly or by ignoring all the warning signs, suddenly realizes there’s a problem, and decides he’s absolutely needed to fix it, comes in and makes a fuss, and usually just ends up pissing off the people who are and have been working on the problem.

(Just FYI, I will not be suspending my blog, though I am considering calling the office and saying that I can’t come in to work because I’m urgently needed in Washington to solve the economic crisis.)

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